February 20, 2015

Hi you guys. Welcome to my blog where I talk about my past. It's a blog where I think about things when I was on my back.

The cool thing about living in Australia was I got to go to some amazing locations. I think I talked about this before but some of the islands off of Australia were amazing. Like the Whit Sunday Islands. Rottenest Island off of Perth. Lizard Island off of Queensland. Norfolk Island. It's call Norfolk but I called it No Fuck Island, because there's no fucking way I'd go back there again. Sorry you guys, but it's kind of true. Sorry anybody out there who's associated with tourism to this island. Anyway, the point is, I went to some great locations you would not normally go to.

You know, I used to drink right, a little bit. So, one time I was working with this English fashion magazine. We got done working and the editor wanted to have a drink so she made up her favorite drink and gave one to me. It was red bull and vodka. I'd never had that before. Well, I had about 4 of them. What happens to a person when they drink 4 red bulls and vodka? They go to karaoke. Yeah, that's right, one time I went to a karaoke bar where I had more red bulls and vodka. Next thing you know, I'm on stage slaughtering a song. My singing is terrible. Anyway, there was one particular group of people that didn't approve of my singing. They were a bunch of Asian men wearing suits. They were all paying attention to one guy in particular. They took their karaoke very seriously. The vibes coming from them were so intense I stopped mid-song and sat down. I was having a good time up until then. I think they wanted to kick my ass. So the moral of the story is: don't drink too many red bulls and vodka and go to a karaoke bar. Oh yeah, I'm pretty sure those guys in their suits were mafia.

You know, I lived there in Australia for about 12 years. I really miss it. It was a great place to start photography. I don't know how the kids do it nowadays, you know, starting out. It's gotta be tough. I remember, I used to shoot like 2 editorial dories a week. It was a great place to start out. One thing I really regret is I had a chance to buy a small house on a peninsula overlooking the ocean. My wife and I almost did it. We almost bought it but we didn't.  It would have been a great place to go back to. Anyway, I'm done reminiscing. These are all things I thought about while I was in the hospital with my traumatic brain injury.  It's freezing here right now. I'm thinking of some more warm stories to tell you next week.

This is B. Nice signing off, from Ice Station Zebra. Have a good week. Love, B. Nice

Here's my blog about the present.

February 17, 2015

Hi everybody. I was gonna blog with you on the 14th, but there was so much snow, we had to cancel. I'll, therefore, tell you a story today. It'll be short.

OK, so check this out. I had a french girlfriend who was an actress living in Paris a while back. I lived in New York City. We were talking over the phone and we decided it would be romantic if I were to come over to Paris. Well, we decided to meet at our favorite cafe on February 14th, you know, Valentine's day. While I hopped on an overnight flight on February 13th, I arrived in France on the morning of February 14th. I proceeded to our favorite cafe. I sat down with a box of chocolates I brought for her and ordered a baguette of french bread, butter and coffee. She wasn't there so I ordered another french bread, butter and coffee. Some time went by. She didn't show up so I ordered another french bread, butter and coffee. Mind you, this is before cell phones. It got to be early lunch so I ordered a croque Monsieur and a beer. She still didn't show up, so I ordered another croque Monsieur and beer. She still wasn't there. My patience was running out so I asked the waiter if I could use the cafe telephone. There was no answer at her number so I sat down, ordered another croque monsieur and beer. I then tried calling her again. I woke her up. She sounded a little confused. She said, "What day is it? What time is it? Where are you?" After a brief argumentative moment in french I realized I'd gotten stood up and decided it would be best if I went back to New York. So I ate all of her chocolates, had another beer and caught the next flight back to New York. How's that for a Valentine's story. Hope you had a better one than that. Oh, and by the way, if you happen to be dating a french actress, good luck.

This is B. Nice signing off from Ice Station Zebra. Love, B. Nice

Don't forget about my blog to the present.

February 6, 2015

Hi everybody. Welcome to the blog where I talk about the past.

You know the people I used to work with were like my family. I got real close to them. Maybe too close. One time I was shooting. The art director was standing next to me. I stopped shooting to change rolls of film. I stretched, took a big yawn, turned around and the woman that was on our crew was sitting on the steps right behind me. She was wearing a nice sun dress and nothing else. She was going commando. I finished stretching, turned around, cleared my throat and said to the art director next to me, "Hey Jane, why don't we shoot on the steps behind me for the next shot." And Jane turned around and screamed, "Oh my God!" covered her eyes and fell to the ground, and screamed "Oh my God!" again. I thought it was a bit dramatic. I think the woman behind me caught on and she crossed her legs. We did do the next shot there but the whole feeling was a bit different. Oh by the way, it was a bit of a shock.

The next story took place in Miami, you know, South Beach. It was a real tacky Miami Beach house full of glass and marble. Anyway, I finished my breakfast and the husband of the house left with his brief case. He got in his mid-life crisis sports car and took off. The wife of the house was doing dishes in the house. The sink was in a bay window overlooking the pool. (Now things get a bit interesting here. I think I was on the set of a porno movie.) Going back to the woman doing the dishes overlooking the pool: the pool boy shows up. He's wearing the shortest and tightest shorts I've ever seen on a man. He was wearing the shorts and nothing else. He might have been going commando. She was washing the dishes and gave him a coy smile. He was brushing the side of the pool with a long pole and gave her a cocky smile and nodded his head. It was a classic moment. I can't imagine what happened when we left. Wait! I can imagine what happened when we left because he was still there cleaning the pool. I wonder what else he cleaned.

It was always interesting going on location. You never knew where you would end up. You would always get a slice of people's lives. One time, another time, I was shooting at a home and the homeowner was a Hollywood-type woman, a producer. Anyway, after I got done shooting she offered me a beer and I said, "Sure, why not." So I had a beer, and mind you, she's single. About 55 or so and very hungry, if you know what I mean. Anyway, I had my beer quickly and this dude shows up. He's about, I don't know, 25. He looks at me like - "Don't mess with my territory, man," and starts giving me a hard time. I quickly left.

I think I told you about some other location stories in some previous blogs. You know, there was that one time when that big dildo fell off the bed. The time we messed with the woman's house who was obsessive compulsive. The time I almost got killed by a stereo. Go back and check it out. I have lots of stories. I'll tell you one mre.

One time I was shooting in this small town outside of LA. I hated shooting there. Anyway, I was shooting, and mind you, I like to shoot spontaneously, you know, follow the light. I went up to the next corner because I saw some nice light. Well, as I'm starting to shoot, my phone rings. I stop the shoot. I answer the phone. I hear, "Brian Nice?" I say, "Yes." A woman says, "You're on the wrong corner." It kind of freaked me out. I said, "What?" The woman said, "You're supposed to be one block south." It felt like Big Brother was watching me.

I'm gonna leave it at that for now. I'll include a few cartoons I used to draw. I can't draw like this anymore, but I still paint abstract stuff. Have a good week. Love, B. Nice

P.S. Here's a link to my blog about the present.

January 31, 2015

Hi everybody. Welcome to my blog where I talk about the past. You know I would lie for a long time on my back thinking about past things. I'm gonna tell you a couple of past stories I thought about. They'll be random stories because often my memory was random.

Actually, I'm still like that now. I had a client that would always snap her fingers and say, "Brian, Brian, Earth to Brian. Focus on what we're doing please." Sorry, see, here I go again, off on a tangent. Anyway, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, the past.

I learned to drive on the ice, literally by driving on the ice. Let me explain: My grandfather lived in Minnesota. At my age of 10, he decided it was time for me to learn how to drive on the ice. So he got the car, drove down to the lake, determined the ice was safe enough to drive on. He proceeded to take the car onto the lake. He then drove to the middle of the lake and put me on his lap to drive the car. Even at the age of ten I knew something was not right. I said, "Is this safe Grandpa?" He said, "Sure, just don't go by the springs." Anyway, I drove aournd the lake doing spins and turns, avoiding the ice fishing houses. It was a lot of fun. Yes, I did learn how to drive on ice. Oh, by the way, I still am very good at driving on slippery roads. One time I was driving to a track meet, you know going like 55 in snow. The car did like a high speed turn. You know, a 360 degree turn. My passenger was screaming and holding the roof. I was just laughing and having a great time.

You know, often when I was shooting I would take a break in the middle of the day. It would all depend on where I was. I would always like to shoot in nice light. You know, early morning or late afternoon. That would always leave the middle of the day open to us. I would often go surfing in the middle of the day depending on where we were. Mexico was always a great place for shooting and surfing. Cabo St. Lucas was always a great place to shoot and surf.  It was one of my favorites. You know, when you're a fashion photographer you had to keep up on where to go, who the good models were, who was good at hair, who was good at makeup. You know, you had to do a lot of research when you weren't shooting. I would often go to the agencies, like the model agencies, to stay on top of who was really  good. I would make the rounds when I wasn't working. It would come in handy when the client would ask for suggestions. You really gotta stay on top of things. It was very important. Also, knowing where to go. That was very important. I guess you could say I was a little spoiled though. Clients would say, "Were should we go Brian?" And I would think, "Hmm, the surfing is good in Mexico." And I would say, "Let's go to Mexico!" And I even got paid for this. I was pretty lucky. Anyway, I'm gonna leave it at that. I'll leave you my link about the present and a couple of cartoons I did. I loved the people I worked with. I'll leave a cartoon of one shoot I did.

Have a good week. Love, B. Nice

January 23, 2015

Hi you guys. Welcome to the blog where I talk about the past. I'm gonna include a cartoon above. Let me tell you the story behind it.

I was getting ready to build my house and I was staking out an area for the foundation. My neighbor was really upset that I was building. She threatened to call the cops. I was all legal and everything was cleared with the council, but I wanted to see what she was up to so, like a very intelligent person, I crawled through the brush under some trees and under her deck. I heard her dial the phone and call the department of environmental conservation. I was starting to take mental note of it when all of a sudden my cell phone started ringing, I started to freak out. She said in a very raspy voice, "Hello, hello. Is someone there? Is someone here?" I turned the phone off and sheepishly crawled back to my foundation. That was a close one.

I always seem to be getting in trouble with someone. I remember this one time we were going through Iranian customs. (This is in 1975 or so.) Well, we had some posters from China. You know, like real fascist looking stuff. It was kind of cool. Anyway, they wanted to confiscate the posters and being an intelligent person like I am, I was ten mind you. I said to the customs guy, "You can't do that! My Daddy will beat you up!" I started jumping up and down. They all started laughing. I guess it was a bit of comic relief going on there. They did end up taking the posters though.

One other time I was in Spain shooting for Spanish Elle. I was going through customs and the customs agent started giving us a hard time about the film. I had about 1200 rolls and he wanted to X-ray it all. Well, my assistant said we wanted to swipe every roll and we'd stick around to do it. (They swipe for explosives.) And then my assistant said, "I'd like to talk to the head of security." The customs agent said, "I am the head of security," and my intelligent assistant said, "Yeah? If you're the head of security, then I'm the president of France." No a smart thing to say to a man with a gun. I said, "OK, OK just X-ray everything. We'll call it art if it gets messed up."

That's about it for now. I'm pretty tired from therapy, Hope you guys have a good week. Love, B. Nice

It was my birthday the other day. Here's the card my dad made me, and here's a link to blog about the present.