November 8, 2016

BrianNice_XCountry-2013_2727-04

Hi everybody. Welcome to the blog where I talk about the past. It’s election day today. I’m gonna tell you a story about the past, something I already blogged about recently, but I think it’s appropriate for today.

In the 90’s I was at a bar in lower Manhattan. The bar was called The Bowery Bar. I was there for a Ford Model Party. They have their annual holiday party at places like this. Anyway, I was sitting at a table talking to a bunch of models I work with, when all of a sudden I felt someone trying to squeeze in on my conversation. I mean, really squeeze in. They were being really rude and pushy. Well, I let this person know I wasn’t happy and I used my left elbow. Well, let’s just say, I used my left elbow forcefully. All I felt was whale blubber. I look over, and lo and behold, it’s Donald Trump. He didn’t seem to be too happy. Anyway, I also felt a presence behind me. I turned around and it was the world’s largest man. He adjusted my chair. I got the message. He meant for me to get out of my chair, and I did. I went up and got a beer. I remember thinking, wow, this is how this guy must operate. And then I thought, wow, what a bully. Then I thought, wow, what a dick! My friend here says, I bet the women were unhappy you left. I actually feel kind of sorry for the Donald cause those women are pretty tough. They know when to smile and they know when to tell a dick to piss off.

October 25, 2016

BrianNice_XCountry-2013_2727-04

Hi you guys. Welcome to the blog where I talk about the past.

I’ve already blogged to you about the following event a bit, but I’m gonna do it again anyway, just to make a point.

You know, I don’t really get involved in politics at all, but I want to talk to you about something. The following event took place in New York City, in the 90’s. It was at a bar called The Bowery Bar, in lower Manhattan. The Ford Modeling Agency was having their annual holiday party. I was sitting at a big table with a bunch of models I work with. All of a sudden some person starts trying to squeeze in on my conversation. He was being real pushy so I introduce him to my left arm. I look up and it was Donald Trump. He didn’t seem to be very pleased. Then I felt a presence behind me. I turned around and it was the world’s largest man standing right behind me. The guy looked like a defensive lineman for the New York Giants. The guy was HUGE. Anyway, this guy decided to help me with my chair. He pulled it out a little so I could go, “Refresh my drink.” I got the message and left. As I was walking away, I thought to myself, “Well, this is probably how he deals with things all the time.” Then I thought, “Wow, what a bully.” Then I thought, “What a dick!” I went and got a beer at the bar and took my conversation somewhere else.

Need I say more? And this is the type of person that some of you want to elect to be our president? I see a long trip to New Zealand in my future if you guys go ahead and elect him. Anyway, that’s it for now. I’ll get off of my soap box now.

This is B. Nice signing off. Check out my other blog where I talk about the present. Have a good week. Love, B. Nice

October 10, 2016

lti_305601_7848-6

Let’s call this blog, Angels.

Now, I classify angels as Dark Angels and Light Angels. Dark Angels have their own issues. Light Angels seem to have their act together. Bottom line is, they have one thing in common. They have a heart of gold and they are there to help you. Help you with no strings attached, no hidden agenda, no drama. Going through this traumatic brain injury, I’ve seen a lot of angels, let me tell you. Especially, when you’re in hospital on all those drugs they give you. I mean it’s crazy! I thought my daughter was on top of the TV set. I actually made my cousin go and take her down from the TV. That stuff is strong, let me tell you.

I just wanted to share with you something about the past. You know, being a fashion photographer, I had to do two catalogues a month and one editorial or a test, just to make ends meet. I built a house in the Hamptons, by the ocean, to use as a location. It was all working good until my injury. I wanted to tell you this because I used to surf right in front of my house. One day I was surfing and a huge wave came knocking me onto the rock. I was unconscious, sinking to the bottom of the sea. There was a voice in my head that said, “Wake up. You’re a Dad. And you can’t leave your daughter alone.” So I made it out of the ocean by climbing my leash to the surface, got onto my surfboard, and washed onto the shore. So you see, my daughter was a light angel. Pretty cool huh? And you know what? She wasn’t even born yet.

This is B. Nice signing off. And check out my other blog where I talk about the present.

Love, B. Nice

September 21, 2016

lti_300700_6665-13

Hi you guys. Welcome to the blog where talk about the past.

I have no idea what I’m gonna talk about. I just thought something would come to my mind, but I’m drawing a blank. Actually, I’m talking to my friend here. I said, what should I talk about? And she started sneezing. That reminded me, I used to get allergies really bad. One time I was doing a photo shoot. The model was back lit, you know, the sun behind her. I could see tons of pollen in the air. I realized, I’m allergic to pollen. It made me start sneezing. I couldn’t stop. It was an endless achoo, achooo. Needless to say, we stopped early that day.

I’m drawing a blank right now, of stories from the past. So I’ll leave you with a couple of pictures. I hope you have a good week. Miss you guys. Talk to you soon. Love, B. Nice

P.S. Here’s my link to my other blog.

lti_300700_6667-1

 

September 14, 2016

lti_300700_6662-3-copy

Hi everybody. Welcome to my blog where I talk about the past.

In the 80’s I lived in Australia. Sydney, Australia. They were about to have a big air show, just west of Sydney. So I decided to go. I love airplanes. It was also cool to photograph the spectators. Anyway, I drove out to Homebush, where the show was. Parked my car, and hopped on the shuttle bus over to the show. Well, close to the entrance was the end of the runway. The whole airport was sealed off by a fence. There were some young kids climbing through a hole in the fence at the end of the runway. Well, the inner child in me decided to hop off the bus and follow the kids. I crawled, commando style, with the kids, to the end of the runway. It was just in time to see a British tornado aircraft take off and go straight vertical, like a rocket ship, towards the sky. It was pretty cool and now I know why they call the plane the tornado. It was so loud it was unreal. Then, all of a sudden, the plane did what they call a fuel dump, into the afterburners. It creates a column of fire. The fire was heading down straight towards us. It all dissipated above us. It was far away from us, but it looked real cool. I could still feel the heat though. I sheepishly crawled back to the hole in the fence, thinking to myself, “Man, I’m getting to old for this shit.”

You know, when you’re in the hospital, you think of some weird stuff, just to pass the time. Now, if you’re a little sensitive, you might not want to read any further. Sensitive, that is, to puke. Yes, I’m gonna tell you some puke stories. Something I thought of just to pass the time.

One time I was on a boat in the Caribbean heading out for a dive. There was a young kid right across from me in the dive boat. He had the regulator in his mouth. Well, the seas were really rough, and I think you might know where I’m going with this. Well, the kid looked rather green, and he threw up in his regulator. Now, I don’t know if you know what a regulator is, but it’s the round piece that fits in your mouth. There are two tubes on either side where the bubbles exit. Well, in this case, it was puke that was shooting out from both sides and hitting the people on either side of him. Well, this caused them to puke. Then, next, the other people started puking. It was a puke-fest. I quickly jumped off, which led to another story I told you earlier. Remember, I grabbed the wrong weight belt and didn’t put air in by bc vest? I sank about 120 feet. But, that’s another story.

Another time, I was sitting in my bedroom about to make out with a girl. I stared into her eyes. She stared into mine. I leaned over to kiss her, and she immediately puked and puked up into one of my cowboy boots. I still have those boots. Every time I put them on, I think of her.

OK, I’ll just tell you two more stories. I think I told you this, but after a heavy night of drinking, we decided to go get some pancakes. This was about 4 in the morning. Well, I walked past this huge picture window, to go to the restaurant. Inside the restaurant, people were having pancakes, waffles, hot chocolate with whipped cream. Well, I stopped and just stared at everyone eating. They all looked like  a cartoon from that cartoon strip called FarSide. They were all just shoveling food into their face. Well, I stood there for what felt like eternity, then started sweating. Of course, I puked all over the window, which mortified all the people inside. I then proceeded to fall into some bushes. It was the first time I ever got thrown out of a restaurant without even going into the restaurant.

OK, one more puke story. My friend was leaving a bar. He took out his car keys. I said, “No way you’re driving home.” He held his keys up and said, “Yeah, I am.” I grabbed his keys and ran to his car. I hopped into his car, shut all the doors, locked all the doors, rolled up all the windows. He proceeded to chase me to his car, was pounding on the windows. All of a sudden he stopped pounding on the windows. He looked at me rather confused. He then proceeded to vomit all over the window and fall down. Thank god I had rolled up the window. My friend here said, “Oh Youth!” and I agree. It’s fun to be a young idiot. And, yes, I was a young idiot. Wait a minute! I still am a young idiot.

I’ve got many more puke stories, but I’ll save you from them.

This is B. Nice, signing off. Love, B. Nice

PS. Here’s the link to my other blog where I talk about the present.

August 31, 2016

BrianNice_XCountry-2013_10_2_2-09

Hi everybody. Welcome to my blog where I talk about the past.

This blog is gonna be a little different. It’s gonna be a bit twilight zone-ish. I’ll explain why. I was going through my camera bag and I found a roll of exposed film. I was intrigued to see what was on it so I developed it. My lab sent me back the result on August 18. Now August 18 is the day I had my brain  bleed in 2009. So, on the roll of film was me doing therapy in 2009. How weird is that? I thought maybe I should run down and play the lottery. Anyway, I just thought I’d share that with you. But, it did make me realize I am getting better. Man, I couldn’t even stand up. I was in a bad way. I’ll try and include a photo. It’s pretty wild.

1149-06

I’ll just share with you, one other story from the past. It’s pretty funny. I used to travel a lot with my dog Buster. He’s the one who was in my book Rescue Tails. Anyway, I used to travel around with my dog. Mostly on the airplane. Now, the travel bag I had for him looked like any other camera bag. It was very simple. It didn’t look like a dog bag. One time I put the bag with Buster in it under the seat in front of me. Well, about 15 minutes into the flight my dog Buster let the most silent but deadly fart known to mankind go. Everyone looked at the guy in seat 20J, the seat Buster was under. The guy looked around as if to say, “I didn’t do it!” and I say, “He who smelt it dealt it.” It was pretty funny.

Anyway, that’s about all this week. Check out my other blog where I talk about the here and the now. Have a good one. This is B. Nice signing off. Love, B. Nice

August 3, 2016

LTI_300700_6664-1

Hi you guys! Sorry about the slight delay. My daughter was here most of July, so I kind of got side tracked, but here we go!

The following story takes place in Australia. I lived in Australia for over ten years. I was there with my first wife. In the beginning, we were there under tourist visas. Back then, you had to leave the country every six months and re-enter the country to get another six months. Well, I would often go to New Zealand, specifically, the South Island, to reinstate my visa. I would take a short trip to Christ Church and drive to Queenstown. It was a beautiful drive. Only problem was, when you went to rent a car, they would offer you free bus service to Queenstown. Apparently it was so beautiful, tourists would drive right off the road. Hence, the free bus service. The other thing we found out about, was you never park your car to go for a hike. There were these giant birds that were like a cross between a raven and a parrot. They love rubber on cars. It was like parking your car in Spanish Harlem in the ’80’s. There was nothing left. The birds would totally trash the car. The other fun thing was, if you went during mating season, the elk would keep you up all night. I found this out the hard way (and no, they didn’t find me attractive). We would rent a cabin and all night long the elk would be screeching looking for a mate. It was unreal. I didn’t sleep at all. But other than those three things, the South Island was beautiful. Especially Milford Sound.

P.S. And did you know that the air standard for the world is taken from the tip of South Island? The air there is so so clean. You notice it right away. Just a bit of trivia for you.

OK, I’ll give you a story from the recent past. I built a house and became good friends with my construction manager. He used to often take me around and show me projects he was working on. Well, he’d just gotten done with this big house. The family he was building for was ultra conservative. There were shutters on every window of the house, this big house. My friend said, as we pulled up, he said, “I gave the new tenants a gift. I etched into each shutter the profile of a dragonfly.” His name was Frank. I said, “Frank, that’s cool, but did you know that in the gay community, the symbol of the dragonfly represents a very famous poem. The poem is titled, ‘Come Hither and Fly Away with me.’ The dragon fly is a symbol of this poem. It’s very well known.” Now Frank is about 6’4″ really short hair, a big guy from the middle of LongIsland. He turned to me, put his head back, looked at me kind of cross eyed, and in a think long island accent said, “You’re shitting me!” I started laughing and laughing so hard. I said, “Frank, I’m just messing with you.” And he said to me, “You’re a sick pup, you know that?”

That’s all for this week. This is B. Nice signing off. Here’s my other blog where I talk about the present. Have a good week. Love, B. Nice

May 24, 2016

LTI_300700_6663-12

Hi everybody. Welcome to the blog where I talk about the past.

So it’s come to this. I was in acapulco, in a pool, surrounded by Roman columns with flames coming out the top. I was swimming naked, being served champagne by high class hookers in high heels. My friend here said, “Did you just say, ‘just high heels?'” No, they had metallic bathing suits on. Very 70’s. The women were serving champagne and various other adult entertainment items. Now I’m stuck at home. I’m 55 and living with my parents. I’m watching public broadcasting TV and watching the most depressing detective story I’ve ever seen. Oh yeah, and I’m in my bed with the world’s smelliest dog. What’s the world coming to? My parents did save me though. They saved me from a nursing home. My mom has been looking after me and she’s doing an amazing job. Thought I’d just throw that in there.

You know, you take it for granted, but my job brought me to some amazing restaurants. i miss those days. I should have weighed like 300 pounds. We ate great. Hawaii was my favorite because we would have fresh fish every night. The sushi was amazing. Come to think of it, I should be a consultant for people who want to go on vacation. I know where all the good food is.

I’m gonna leave it at that cause I’ve got to go back to therapy – or was it dinner? I can’t remember. Have a good week.

Oh yeah, here’s the blog where I talk about the present.

Love, B. Nice

May 17, 2016

kangaroos

Hi you guys. Welcome to the blog where I talk about the past. A family friend came by the other day and dropped off some dinner. A much appreciated dinner. It reminded me of the picture above.

I told you this story a long time ago, but it was so great I think I’ll tell you again. I call this story, “My Friend.”

It took place in an area called Pretty Beach, Australia. When you would sit down around the campfire, a bunch of kangaroos would come and hang out with you. They were looking for food. Now, imagine this. imagine about eight kangaroos sitting around a campfire like they were your friends. They would sit there and stare at you. Well, I was holding a box of cereal and I reached out to give them some cereal. One of them reached out his paw. Their paws are scary. Their hands are like claws. You’d think they’d be soft and cuddly but they’re not. On top of it all, their back legs are powerful with a middle toe that is like a switchblade. I’ve been told to stay away from their back legs. All my Australian friends say, “Oy mate, she’ll cut you in two seconds.” Pleasant thought. Anyway, I reached out to give this small kangaroo some cereal. The kangaroo knocked all the cereal off my hand, grabbed the box and ran off with it. All the others chased him into the bush.

That’s all for this week. Miss and love all you guys. Love, B. Nice

Oh, check out my other blog, where I talk about the present.

For those interested in following & supporting Brian Nice through out his recovery & beyond.