November 17, 2016

04

Hi everybody. Welcome to my blog where I talk about the past. Now, I’m gonna combine Halloween with Veteran’s Day. Sounds bizarre right? Well, after I tell you the following story, you’ll know what I mean.

The following story takes place in Australia, around 1990. I used to go to events all the time, to photograph people at the events. You know, things like air shows, parades, etc. Well, one Veterans Day I went to a parade. I photographed these veterans on a wall. I then got the film back and looked closer to the left, and you know what? There was a creepy kid in the left corner. He wasn’t there when I took the photo — doo dooodooodoo doood oood ooodoooo. Kind of creepy right? So whatever you do, do not show this photo to anyone.

I’m gonna do another story. I may have told you this already, but it’s kind of cool, and since it was election time, I thought this story would be appropriate.

The following story takes place in Washington D.C. around the early 80’s. I apprenticed with this guy in New York. I did stuff like clean floors, toilets, kept the studio clean. You know, stuff like that. I was third assistant. Anyway, I overheard the guy I worked for say, “Hey, let’s bring the new guy to Washington.” Well, I was all excited because it was gonna be my first trip. I had one job. Very simple. I had one claim check and one stand bag to look after. That was my job. Well, it was a good trip going down there. I was all excited. We went to the Capitol Building to photograph the Senators’ wives. It was great. We got VIP treatment. Barbara Bush met us, and we set things up outside of George Bush’s office in the Capitol Building. Well, I was all cocky and full of myself, until I realized, I left my one bag at the airport. The stand bag. My cock behavior went from cockiness to pure TERROR. (And you wonder why I have a brain bleed.) Anyway, I overheard the photographer say, “Tell that kid he’s got 30 minutes to get the bag. Otherwise, he’ll never work for me again.” Well, I did something you could never do nowadays. I RAN through the Capitol Building. Jumped into our station wagon and made incredible time to the airport. I think I broke the sound barrier. I got to the airport, opened up all the car doors, left the keys in the ignition, left the car on, I left the music on really loud and ran inside. When I got to lost baggage, I saw the stand bag behind the counter. Only problem was there were about five people ahead of me. Well, I kind of pushed my way to the front and jumped up and down and said, “That’s my bag, that’s my bag, that’s my bag.” Everyone was staring at this young idiot jumping up and down. Well, I threw my baggage claim ticket at them, picked up the bag from behind the counter and started running through the airport. I got to the car, threw the bag in (oh yeah, there were a lot of police around the car) and yelled, “I’ve got to get to the Capitol Building, Sorry.” I shut all the doors and sped off as fast as I could. I saw in my rear view mirror, I saw the police scratching their heads and looking at me. I think I stunned them. It all happened so fast. Well, I got to the Capitol Building and there was a long line at the X-ray machine. I pushed my way to the front and said something about Barbara Bush and they let me through. I made it back to the photoshoot and the photographer was just finishing his egg sandwich and coffee. He put the NYTimes down and they just started coming out from hair and make-up. I set up the lights on the stand and we started working like nothing happened. Yeah, I dodged a bullet on that one. That night, we went out to dinner with the hair and makeup artist. The guy wore a three piece suit. He was a real strange guy. He also worked on Ronald Reagan’s hair and make up. We got him all liquored up and asked him how Ronald Reagan put on his make up and did his hair. Well the guy, turned on a dime to Mr. Serious. He looked at us and said, “That’s a matter of national security. I cannot discuss this.” The guy freaked me out. I was thinking let’s change the subject before this guy takes a cyanide pill.

The guy worked for always said I was the worst assistant, but I turned out to be a good photographer, he said. That’s always reassuring.

Talk to you guys next week. Love, B. Nice

Here’s the link to my other blog.

November 8, 2016

BrianNice_XCountry-2013_2727-04

Hi everybody. Welcome to the blog where I talk about the past. It’s election day today. I’m gonna tell you a story about the past, something I already blogged about recently, but I think it’s appropriate for today.

In the 90’s I was at a bar in lower Manhattan. The bar was called The Bowery Bar. I was there for a Ford Model Party. They have their annual holiday party at places like this. Anyway, I was sitting at a table talking to a bunch of models I work with, when all of a sudden I felt someone trying to squeeze in on my conversation. I mean, really squeeze in. They were being really rude and pushy. Well, I let this person know I wasn’t happy and I used my left elbow. Well, let’s just say, I used my left elbow forcefully. All I felt was whale blubber. I look over, and lo and behold, it’s Donald Trump. He didn’t seem to be too happy. Anyway, I also felt a presence behind me. I turned around and it was the world’s largest man. He adjusted my chair. I got the message. He meant for me to get out of my chair, and I did. I went up and got a beer. I remember thinking, wow, this is how this guy must operate. And then I thought, wow, what a bully. Then I thought, wow, what a dick! My friend here says, I bet the women were unhappy you left. I actually feel kind of sorry for the Donald cause those women are pretty tough. They know when to smile and they know when to tell a dick to piss off.